Nicklas Johnson · morons.org - Police Dog Bites Off Robbery Suspect's Penis

Random: Police Dog Bites Off Robbery Suspect's Penis

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Chomp.
Posted by samrolken on Apr. 07, 2002 17:00 UTC
25 comments from readers. Join the discussion!

According to a story being carried at Yahoo! News, a fleeing robbery suspect was incapacitated by a police dog chasing him.

The man allegedly stole a pack of cigarettes from a liquor store in Florida. The dog chased him down, and first bit his buttocks, then severed his penis. Unfortunately, he had it reattatched, likely enabling future reproductive activities. Too bad.

--Sam Kennedy

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Posted by splorp from Milky Way on Apr. 08, 2002 20:42

Kind of a rough punishment for just stealing a pack of cancer sticks... Ouch...

splorp! Evil Bastard

Posted by Radish on Apr. 08, 2002 20:44

So, does this count as police brutality? I doubt a human officer would be legally allowed to mutilate somebody like this; it shouldn't be any different with a police dog.

Derleth: Bad cop! No doughnut! Really, I think the dog was a bit overzealous. Maybe it...

Derleth: OK, that sounds dumb. The dog was overzealous. It got too excited about the...

Legion303: If you kill a police dog, the penalties are exactly the same as if you kill a...

spc419k: If you flee from a police dog what do you expect to happen? Lick you?

Posted by MidoriFox on Apr. 08, 2002 21:09

On a horrible side note, the dog's name was Scooby. SCOOBY.

Which only further makes me wonder whether this really qualified as a Scooby snack.

Hedonist69: ROTFLMAO!

Posted by Sophist from USA on Apr. 08, 2002 21:12

A police dog is a weapon, plain and simple. No reasonable person would agree that the officer concerned should have shot the thief, and I fail to see how sicking a vicious animal on him is any different. Excessive force, big time.

Pansy Bedwetter: Unlike other weapons, a dog is used primarily to capture and detain a fleeing...

Posted by DOk on Apr. 08, 2002 22:06

Poor guy. Even if he'd escaped he would have been caught by a vacationing British bobby. His injury is a bloody tip off.

Pansy Bedwetter: bad, bad - no treat for you....

Posted by Hiro Protagonist from Evanston IL on Apr. 08, 2002 23:33

To quote Herr Starr,

"My cock is in the bitch's mouth....and not in a good way."

EvilVey: Preacher. Excellent...

Posted by Yoozer at work on Apr. 09, 2002 24:09

you'd think the dog would be disgusted by the buttocks already, and wouldn't aim for the more private and possibly smelly parts.

eww.

Posted by Idealistic Fatman from Ljubljana Slovenia on Apr. 09, 2002 24:45

You can't blame the doggie for going after the sausage, that's what I always say!

Posted by Joshie blah on Apr. 09, 2002 11:44

Clearly this dog had a mental defect or illness spurred on by other lowlife sinful dogs who led him into a life of beastiality and satanic habits.

Won't somebody please think of the puppies?

Posted by Sarcastatron 2020 on Apr. 09, 2002 13:17

Does this remind anyone of hmm, say, the Diane Whipple dog mauling trial?

What if the guy decides to use that precedent to sue the police department? They used excessive force with a known weapon to detain a suspect. Sounds like grounds for a lawsuit to me.

Posted by Marduk from NYC on Apr. 09, 2002 14:03

That's a high price to pay for a pack o' cigarettes!

Posted by Pansy Bedwetter on Apr. 10, 2002 09:00

Don't steal and you won't have to worry about that sort of thing......it's common sense.

Posted by Napsterbater from Hawaii on Apr. 11, 2002 02:03

Dont do the crime... Dont get your nuts chomped off

Posted by Legion303 on Apr. 11, 2002 21:00

Warning: The Surgeon General has determined that smoking may lead to a higher risk of getting your beanbag bitten off.

Posted by AL on Apr. 12, 2002 23:13

Hey guys, first time posting here...

I heard this story on the 10 o'clock news in my area a few nights ago, I was rolling on the ground for almost 20 minutes afterwards...

just to clear a few things up, I vaguely remember the reporter saying that after the dog bit and tried to detain the guy, he struggled with the dog, that's when it severed his penis.

So you can almost make the arguement (depending on how reliable Fox news is and since "struggled with the dog" is pretty ambiguous) that the dog chompped off his love tube as an act of self defense and/or panic.

Posted by eveningfrost from Eugene Oregon on Apr. 13, 2002 22:05

Police. Heh.

I wish the english language carried a word strong enough to convey my hatred for police of any kind. Fortunately, I think the German language has one that describes them nicely. "Untermensch"

DOk: Yeah! I just hate it when The Man's jackbooted Gestapo come down on the...